Well, I made it to Arizona and back. As soon as I landed I fell in love with the flat lands and blazing heat and I do mean BLAZING. While the heat did completely burn up the rest of my relaxer and left me with a sun burn (yes we do burn). I am still super happy with the city.

The days that Casanova Brown was at work I spent hanging time around the city and contemplating life there. Excluding Cassie Brown as a factor could I make a new and more importantly better life for me and the lil divas here? What could I give them here (besides a saner mom) that I can’t give them in our current locale? I sat and really thought about my life and how it looks. I examined it from every angle and considered the outcome of every sincere attempt to make it ..right or even better. It made me sad that still 3 ½ yrs after my divorce my finances are still highly unstable. Two years after being laid off I am still chasing down a job that will let me make at least half of what I use to. As the oldest enters high school this year I think about how I loved my high school years. I remember my mother doing all she could so I could completely enjoy the high school experience. Trust that ain’t cheap. I had a car, a new car before I had a license. She worked two jobs and I worked also so I could get clothes at the hottest mall store now known as Express. Parties, football games, field trips…college. All those things circle my mind constantly. The little one turned 10 this month. I mustered up and sacrificed so she could get a Nintendo DS she had been waiting two years for. She got that and no party. That made me sad.

So I asked myself was Phoenix my promised land? Casanova Brown aside. I enjoyed my trip and I have a way funny store about how Cassie Brown is a fool (next blog entry) but, I came home with a game plan. I finished my resume and prayed over each submission. I had yet another heartfelt conversation with God about my situation and where my life is right now. I asked that he not just listen to my words but, see inside my heart. On the outside it may look like I am chasing a man. Not true. I am looking for more and after checking each and every nook and cranny where we are currently located I know it’s not here.

So I am boxing it up and heading out. I plan to shut it down and head out on or around August 30th. Quick huh?!! I will try to brace the girls as much as I can for the transition.
I remember the new city, new school jitters. But, it’s my love for THEM that gives the strength to even attempt this. I asked that God be with me either way. Even if it blows up in my face (which I am not counting on) I know that God has my back.

In the end I pray that Phoenix is my return. Where I rise. Much like the bird it’s named after. Yea, that’s it. Phoenix will be where I rise(please hold all Maya Angelou jokes)

This entry started out being about my trip to Phoenix. But, I guess my heart had more to say.